Houses and lunches

This weekend we had our first open homes, having put our house on the market.  Lots of reasons for selling, but among them is the desire to be closer to the school the girls will attend from next year, and to have a bigger house.  Anyway, after a feverish week of activity, it all looked tidier and spicker and spanner than it ever had in the 13 months we’ve been living here, and we vacated at lunch time both days.  So, being lunch time and all, we decided the best thing to do would be find a child-friendly cafe and have lunch.

All parents of young children will know the numerous minefields lurking beneath the surface of a simple trip to a cafe for lunch.

First, you need to hit that sweet spot between children getting hungry, and losing the plot because they are too hungry.  If you go into the latter stage, you might as well pack up and go home: they won’t eat anything put in front of them and may just throw a mind-boggling tantrum to top off the outing.

Second, you need to find a table in the cafe that is satisfactory to all: not too hot, not too cold, enough space, not next to the kitchen, and within earshot of the playground that the cafe (hopefully) has.

Third, the cafe needs to have food that your child(ren) will actually consider eating.  Otherwise, you might as well take some money and set fire to it, because the most beautifully prepared food will simply congeal and go cold if it does not appeal to your child’s whimsical tastes.

Fourth, you just need some luck.  If another child throws sand in your child’s face, a cup is overturned spilling hot liquid on someone’s lap, or a delectable piece of food is dropped jammy side down, it can all go to custard.

Over the last almost seven years, I’ve watched plenty of other people pull this off, and wondered how the hell they do it.  I’ve also watched other people spectacularly fail (including myself) and longed for the day when, as a family, we can all sit in a cafe and have a pleasant meal together.

Well, that glorious day has come, twice.  Both yesterday and today the stars aligned and we all enjoyed our lunch, didn’t embarrass ourselves or each other, had food we enjoyed, and left the cafe with our dignity intact.  I’m so relieved, now I know it can happen, who knows – it may even happen again.