Adios oncology!!

Good news – I don’t have to go and see an oncologist ever again!!!  Well, unless, you know, circumstances change.  But at the moment, so long as I keep seeing an ENT regularly I don’t need to visit an oncologist.  I’ve been wondering what the point of the oncology visits is anymore, since the oncologist can’t do any more than look inside my mouth and check my neck for lumps.  The ENT does this, and more, every time I see him.

Plus, visiting the hospital is an ordeal all out of proportion to the reality of what happens when I get there.  The visit today was a text book example of Auckland DHB’s apparent inability to organise a piss up in a brewery.  Or an appointment at the oncology department.

I got a text message from the hospital two weeks ago telling me I had an appointment at 9.20am on the 2nd of November, and asking me to confirm that I’d come.  I rang and asked what it was for, and confirmed I’d be there.

That evening I got home and found a letter telling me about the appointment.  The next day I got a letter telling me the appointment had changed from 9.40am to 9.20am. Never knew it was 9.40am.  Whatever.  The next week I got a letter telling me that it had changed to 9am.  Next day I got a letter telling me I’d missed my appointment on 7 October, and I’d get a new letter in due course with a new appointment.  Finally, I got another text telling me about my 9am appointment, and asking me to confirm it.  So I did.

And when I turn up today, at 9am, I’m kept waiting until 9.40am.  On the dot.

The oncologist spent more time washing his hands after the examination than on the actual exam, so I don’t think I’ll be missing anything by stopping this process.  And I’ll stop having the useless sleepless nights beforehand.

So, goodbye oncology department, may we never meet again.